Persuade His Amused Lordship/Tables

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Difficulty[edit]

Question before the BoardBase Difficulty
1 - Recommending a Route through Occupied Buildings240
2 - Proposing the Demolition of Unused Houses100
3 - Recommending a Route over Marshland220
4 - Recommending a Route through Plainsland260
5 - Route through Hills100
7 - Recommending a Route across a Ravine240
9 - Recommending a Route through Wasteland100
11 - Proposing the Removal of the Efficient Commissioner100
12 - Proposing the Removal of the Jovial Contrarian100
13 - Proposing the Removal of Sinning Jenny100
14 - Proposing the Removal of Feducci300
15 - Proposing the Removal of Virginia100
16 - Proposing the Removal of Furnace Ancona100
17 - Proposing the Removal of the Dean of Xenotheology240
18 - Proposing the Removal of the Bishop of Saint Fiacre's300
19 - Proposing the Removal of the Bishop of Southwark100
20 - Proposing the Removal of the Tentacled Entrepreneur100
21 - Proposing the Removal of the Gracious Widow100
22 - Proposing the Removal of April100
23 - Proposing the Removal of the Wandering Gondolier100
24 - Proposing the Removal of September200
26 - Proposing the Removal of the Viscountess of the Viric Jungle400
27 - Proposing the Removal of the Rubbery Yes-Man100
28 - Proposing the Removal of the Hell-Scarred Gondolier100
29 - Proposing the Removal of Cornelius, the Bandaged Prehistoricist100
30 - Proposing the Removal of January200
31 - Proposing the Removal of the Wry Functionary100
32 - Proposing the Removal of the Delightful Reverend100
33 - Proposing the Removal of the Drummer100
35 - Proposing the Removal of the Dauntless Temperance Campaigner100
37 - Proposing the Removal of the Implacable Detective100
100 - Proposing a Station Plan100
105 - Proposing a Station Plan more like a Fortress240
115 - Proposing a Station Plan styled in the Manner of Hell100
120 - Proposing a Station Plan that Honours the Bazaar100
130 - Proposing a Station Plan that Speaks to the Glory of London and the Empress100
140 - Proposing a Station Plan Suited to Wasteland100
150 - Proposing a Station Plan Suited to a Surface Summer380
160 - Proposing an ice-resistant route and a well-insulated station100
170 - Proposing the connection to the final station at Marigold100
181 - Proposing a Tracklayers' City near Ealing Gardens100
182 - Proposing a Tracklayers' City near the Magistracy of the Evenlode100
183 - Proposing a Tracklayers' City near Balmoral100
184 - Proposing a Tracklayers' City near Station VIII100
185 - Proposing a Tracklayers' City near Burrow-infra-Mump100
186 - Proposing a Tracklayers' City somewhere between Moulin and Hurlers, as no one sensible wants that land at all100
187 - Proposing a Tracklayers' City near Marigold Station, under the walls of Hell100
200 - Recommending Better Defences for Each Train100 + (60 × )
205 - Recommending More Baggage Accommodations for Each Train100 + (60 × )
210 - Recommending More Luxurious Fittings for Each Train100 + (60 × )
220 - Recommending More Worker Compensation400
230 - Recommending Worker Co-ownership340
240 - Recommending the Strike be Broken100
250 - Requesting Funds to Excavate the Remains of a Prehistoric Creature160 or 220
260 - Suggesting the Union Pave Over a Prehistoric Creature300
270 - Requesting Funds to Route Around an Anomalous Section of London260
280 - Proposing to Drive the Track through the Zone180
300 - Proposing a Vote of Self-congratulation100
310 - Proposing a Charitable Gift100
320 - Proposing a Scientific Charter120
330 - Proposing a Charter declaring an Alliance with Hell160
340 - Proposing a Charter engaging in the Work of the Church160
400 - Proposing to Pay Dividends to Shareholders200 + (20 × )
500 - Proposing a Bypass through Parabola300
510 - Proposing the Rental of Hellworms200
520 - Proposing to Venture into the Former Battlefields Around Hell100
521 - Proposing to Venture into the Former Battlefields Around Hell, following Feducci's Guidance100
522 - Proposing to Venture into the Former Battlefields Around Hell, following April's Guidance100
523 - Proposing to Venture into the Former Battlefields Around Hell, following Virginia's Guidance100
525 - Proposing to Venture into the Former Battlefields Around Hell, following the Bishop of Southwark's Guidance100
527 - Proposing to Venture into the Former Battlefields Around Hell, following the Wandering Gondolier's Guidance380
528 - Proposing to Venture into the Former Battlefields Around Hell, following Cornelius' Guidance240
529 - Proposing to Venture into the Former Battlefields Around Hell, following the Viscountess' Guidance100
600 - Proposing that the Board Endorse the Tentacled Entrepreneur for Lord Mayor460
620 - Proposing that the Board Endorse F. F. Gebrandt for Lord Mayor100
700 - Proposing that the Unyielding Highlander become Castellan of Balmoral100
710 - Proposing that September become Castellan of Balmoral300
720 - Proposing that the Fervent Widow become Castellan of Balmoral300
800 - Proposing a tracklayer aligned with Mr Fires300
850 - Proposing Cornelius to lead100
905 - Proposing the Dean of Xenotheology as Patron of the Burrow Church100
910 - Proposing the Bishop of St Fiacre's as Patron of the Burrow Church300
931 - Resuming Normal Operations with Furnace in Charge260
932 - Supporting Cornelius' Prehistoricist Building Approach260
933 - Supporting a Brightly-Lit Building Approach220
934 - Proposing a Package of Measures to Resume Normal Operations180
940 - Proposing special consideration to certain charitable groups260 or 300
941 - Proposing a dividend be paid out to the poor of the Hinterlands260 or 300
1000 - Proposing an expensive tribute to the Hillchanger Tower260
1010 - Proposing an inhuman tribute to the Hillchanger Tower100
1020 - Proposing a calendrical tribute to the Hillchanger Tower100
1100 - Proposing to send your train to war in Parabola
(Cats, FKs, Gent, Visc., Other)
100 (Cats, Visc.)
240 (FKs, Gent)
140 (Other)
1110 - Proposing to build a spur line into Parabola so that you can send in a war-train100

Success Text[edit]

Question before the BoardSuccess Description
3"As long as I don't have to go out there myself," says His Amused Lordship with a chuckle. "There aren't enough wine cellars in the world to pay for that."
4"Perhaps we might burn the grasses on the ground ahead," he says. "That might make it safe enough."
7"I'd like to see the view from the top," […] "I think we should plan the line so that the train stops right above the lava flow, and perhaps serve meals or picnic lunches... if the bridge could bear any extra weight, we might add a viewing platform."
29"By all means, let us get rid of him!" exclaims His Amused Lordship. "He has the methods of a poisoner and the manners of a dockyard dog."
100, 105"Yes, yes, of course! What's a railway without stations? Why would this be a matter for question?"
115, 120"It is certainly... ah." His Amused Lordship tilts his head at the plans. "Novel? I think we may call the plans novel."
130"Ah! This is the sort of thing we might have been building all along," remarks His Amused Lordship. "Very superior to the other architect's drawings, I will say that. Without question."
140, 150His Amused Lordship groans. "if we must," he says. "But it isn't at all the kind of thing I expected we would be doing."
160His Amused Lordship approves the plans, though he's not overly pleased. "Suppose the cold does put a limit on how big the windows can be," he says with uncharacteristic sadness.
170"Good! Why not!" exclaims His Amused Lordship. "Come along, let's get the vote passed, shall we?"
181 - 187"A delightful experiment! I think I shall like to visit," says His Amused Lordship. "With an armed escort, perhaps," he adds, winking. "I vote aye."
205"There might be a value in it," he concedes. "If we need to mount an expedition to the Upper River, for instance."
300, 320 - 340"Having a clear Charter is the first requirement of a well-run business," says His Amused Lordship. "I might quibble with a few lines, but I can accept this if it is in line with the news of the rest."
400"Yes, dividends!" He considers the accounts, then sighs. "Of course, one would like to see amounts large enough to make it worth the bother of calculating them. I suppose, however, that the situation will improve with time."
510"Much safer than any other recommendation I've heard," says His Amused Lordship. "Perhaps we can contractually require that the Devils supply a handler for the worms as well as the worms themselves."
520 - 523, 525, 527 - 529"I suppose it will work as well as any other way," he says. "Though I would have liked the pleasure of planning it myself. But –" He holds up his hands. "That is a whim, only. I don't need to be indulged."
600 - 620Reluctantly," says His Amused Lordship. "When society asks what we were thinking, perhaps I can tell them we meant it in jest."
700"One always wants to see these responsibilities in the hands of the right sort," says His Amused Lordship.
710"A leader should have energy, and he certainly has that."
720"The Fervent Widow will be a very entertaining companion," he remarks, and you have the impression he's only half thinking of her possible administrative functions.
905"Very well!" He is jovial as ever. "But you owe me one." He winks at the Dean who affects not to notice.
910"Very well!" He is jovial as ever. "But you owe me one." He winks at the Bishop who affects not to notice.
932"Ah, what the hell!" He chortles. "If nothing else it will be a fine spectacle."
1000 - 1020"This figure is much less sinister than we've been told to believe," says His Amused Lordship. "Do you suppose it has forgotten its bargain with the Bazaar entirely?" This sounds like bravado, even from him, but he is willing to vote Yes.
1100 - 1110"War is a terrible business," His Amused Lordship says thoughtfully. "The only honourable method is to conduct it with such force and vigour that it is not repeated lightly."

Failure Text[edit]

Question before the BoardFailure Description
1 - 3, 9His Amused Lordship treats you to a long-winded ramble about the risks associated with building on different types of Neathy terrain, a topic in which he did not even pretend to be an expert before he joined the Railway.
4"It is very interesting territory," he says, and it's clear from his inflection that "interesting" is not a good thing.
5"I expect we could find a better solution," he remarks. "If we looked further."
7"It's the expense," he says. "It's so hard to be sure that expedition tickets would ever pay back what we spent on the enterprise."
11"I don't think it would be wise," […] "When she joined the board, she let it be understood that she knows of various dangers we may face as we head west. Moreover, her presence gives us much more latitude with the Masters and the Bazaar."
12His Amused Lordship's counterargument focuses chiefly on how much more tedious board meetings would become without the Jovial Contrarian's provocations.
13"I'd be sorry to see Jenny go," says His Amused Lordship simply, as though you'd proposed exiling her.
14"Oh, come, we can't be rid of Feducci!" says His Amused Lordship. "He has associates in high places, and the danger is that he might not even leave his revenge in their hands."
15"If we want to negotiate with Hell – and we will have to – then we will need her on our side," says His Amused Lordship. "Unless you have another Devil that you consider easier to convince. No?"
16"I don't keep her around for the companionship," […] "You get an earful every time she's in the room. On the other hand, inviting her to the board and then dismissing her again is likely to go over badly with the Union. […]
17"Ah. Yes. The Dean." HIs Amused Lordship looks into the middle distance. "I have a fondness for the University. And if we have a professor, it might as well be her."
18It would be awkward, says His Amused Lordship. "We share social circles. We would be bound to meet again. I would have to explain why I failed to veto his removal."
19"What!" roars His Amused Lordship. "When I was hoping for more wrestling matches in our meetings?"
20"The Tentacled Entrepreneur brought a great deal of money to the enterprise. It would be ungracious of us to reject it again. Though I am hoping it will have some additional cards made soon. The bright yellow one is getting sticky."
21"Her business and ours have not come into conflict so far," says His Amused Lordship. "Meanwhile, she brings with her a length of experience that would be difficult to replicate with any other director."
22, 24, 26, 28 - 33, 35, 37"A more compact Board is generally an improvement," His Amused Lordship remarks. "But not if that Board is unbalanced in the direction of poor decision-making."
23"Yes, he's young," says His Amused Lordship. "But how else is one to learn?" He's rarely extended so much credit to other members of the board.
100, 105, 115 - 130His Amused Lordship frowns at the elevation drawings. "I had imagined something more stately," he says. "The Great Hellbound Railway is the innovation of our age. We should express our pride in the endeavour."
140, 150His Amused Lordship frowns at the elevation drawings. "The style of these buildings has gone from bad to worse! Whatever architect you employ should be sacked."
160, 170His Amused Lordship casts a disapproving eye over the station plans. "Just because we're building on a dismal tundra doesn't excuse such a dingy little building."
181 - 187His Amused Lordship scoffs. "Seems politically difficult. I vote nay."
200, 205, 280"Invest in the track first," says His Amused Lordship, as he usually does. "Everything else wears out."
210"The track," expostulates His Amused Lordship. "The track and the stations. That's where the money should go."
220"That's all very well," says His Amused Lordship. "But where does it end? If we doubled their pay, they'd want it doubled again. Don't set expectations that lead only to disappointment."
230His first reaction is a good laugh. When he grasps that you're serious, he asks sarcastically how you intend to fit all hundred or more owner-workers here into the board room. Folly!
240"I share your views […] But we need to manage this business with at least a little care. […] the consequences could also be quite damaging […] weren't you the one responsible for negotiations […]? You should have seen it didn't come to this."
250"If you want the thing excavated," says His Amused Lordship, "pay for it yourself! That's what I would do if I found some trinket by the track that I fancied for a conversation-piece."
260"Whatever is out there, it may be of some scientific value," objects His Amused Lordship. "That must be worthy of at least a little attention, don't you think?"
270"This sounds like meddling from the Admiralty," says His Amused Lordship. "Not content to do their confounded experiments at Zee. If you ask me, they should be the ones to pay for the entire area to be restored to its previous conditions."
300"I see very little value in making any sort of statement," says His Amused Lordship. "Whatever course we may intend for the Company, its history will be written by circumstance."
310"Occasional donations to the deserving poor are a fine objective," says His Amused Lordship. "The trouble comes when you set up expectations."
320His Amused Lordship is plainly […] tempted, but he says, "There are other institutions that are more straightforwardly devoted to science. We would do better to pursue the business of the company, and donate to those institutions if it seems best."
330His Amused Lordship sighs. "It is without question an amusing idea," he says. "But do we really want to find Moloch Street crowded with protesters?"
340"I'm sure we all admire the work of the Church," says His Amused Lordship. "But might we not admire it from a distance?"
400"I would have no objection if the books were in better order," says His Amused Lordship. "However, the company's record of heedless expenditure does not justify such a motion." His eye rests on you.
500"It is an inventive solution," says His Amused Lordship. "And I am not excessively hesitant about bold solutions when bold solutions are required. In this case, however, there are so many possibilities for error, discovery, and outright disaster."
510"Is there a risk of the worms getting loose and breeding?" asks His Amused Lordship. "My cook has told me stories of a mishap in the larder, and that only involved Blemmigans. I wouldn't like to imagine these things burrowing their way to London."
520 - 523, 525, 527 - 529"Needlessly dangerous and expensive," says His Amused Lordship. "I cannot think this is the way for us."
600"Impossible that society would accept such a Mayor […] To be sure, his mastery of utensils is improving, and he has learned – or been advised – very successfully in matters of fashion. So much else remains out of his grasp, however."
700"Not at all the sort of individual we ought to be backing with the support of the Board," says His Amused Lordship. "I'm surprised that you even suggest it."
710"I can't understand half of what he says," says His Amused Lordship.
720, 800, 850"I can't approve, I'm afraid. Wouldn't be suitable."
905, 910"I can't approve, I'm afraid. We all have to make sacrifices here on the Board. I accept we get inferior port for instance."
931, 933 - 934"I expect we could find a better solution," he remarks. "If we looked further."
932His Amused Lordship takes an opposing view. A very firm opposing view, as a matter of fact.
940 - 941"Can't say I'd go along with that one. Seems a lot of expense for a little charity."
1000 - 1020"The Efficient Commissioner warned us from the very outset about a danger like this," says His Amused Lordship. "While I join some of my colleagues in having found her style overbearing, I cannot doubt she had her reasons."
1100 - 1110His Amused Lordship shakes his head. "I've seen a few battles in my time. I would need stronger persuasion to vote for this."
1200"Not worth it," he remarks sadly. "It's been a good bit of trouble settling the Creditor quietly out there. Let it stay at a good remove."
Board Member: Furnace AnconaSecond paragraph of Failure Description
NoEveryone shifts in their seats. Several people are obviously wishing they had thought to bring a packed lunch.
YesFurnace remarks that His Amused Lordship can always be trusted to vote against, if the proposal doesn't stand to enrich himself or his friends. His Amused Lordship laughs heartily, but in a way that does not bode well for their future relationship.